According to Bloomberg, Ben Bernanke and the Federal Reserve have pledged “to keep the main interest rate near zero for an “extended period” and confirmed that emergency measures to prop up the housing market will end as planned this month.”

Glenn Beck vs. Keith Olbermann: Watching either of their shows brings us uncomfortably near the absolute epitome of douchebag, but alas, when push comes to shove, only one can be the victor. Here I will discuss their individual merits and try to determine who can rightfully claim the throne in all of its douche-filled glory… But when the chips are down, we all know that it is either Keith Olbermann or Glenn Beck who will hold the crown of greatest douchebag in the history of the world.

The differences between different economic systems, explained via cow distribution… Hmmmm:

The Federal Reserve and Treasury have pumped an ungodly amount of money back into the economy, which raises serious concerns about future inflation, but for now, much of that money is stuck in the banks and velocity is extremely low.

So what have some city governments and businesses done to combat this? Well, they’ve decided to print their own money. MSN Money highlights one such example:

Many have oversimplified that Buffet didn’t understand dot.com’s, therefore he didn’t invest in them; and this is why he was able to have the last laugh once the floor caved in on the bubble. As he says: “Risk comes from not knowing what you’re doing.” My feeling is that Buffet knew exactly what dot.com’s were, he simply chose not to bite. In the irrational exuberance of market surges, Buffet, as stated above, knew these companies were not making a profit, therefore there was no true underlying value for most of them. Any great investor, or gambler, knows that the biggest wins usually come when you’re the 5% minority making the wager, and public opinion is going the other wa

The GOP is back, with a new, yet old, face to lead the party. Zombie Ronald Reagan has been reanimated to assure Americans that Republicans have returned to their core values of fiscal responsibility. Reagan’s 8 years in office resulted in an increase in gross federal debt by 18.5% as a percentage of GDP, but perhaps a mutated rabies virus has changed Reagan’s fiscal intentions. (1)

OK, so this is the epitome of economic nerdiness, but admittedly I love it. John Maynard Keynes and F.A. Hayek come back to life to debate whether Keynesian or Austrian economics explain the economy, the only way they know how; rap-off:

If economics is supply and demand, wouldn’t it be useful for companies if they could pull demand out of a hat; if they could create new marketplaces out of thin air, instantly cashing in on the first-mover advantage. There they would stand, titans of industry, as the lone player in a market.

The power of information, and misinformation, is immense. Google provides access to a vortex of data, images and videos with the press of a button (particularly when a user is “feeling lucky”). With the Internet age comes major concerns about privacy. What people find out about you on the Internet could influence whether you get that scholarship or government grant. It could be the reason why you’re turned down for health insurance. It could even be why you attract Facebook stalkers. In any case, there may be a way out of this unstoppable exposition of your personal life: move to a remote village. The Onion News Network reports:

We at SwiftEconomics would love to wish our readers a Happy New Year and apparently, so do all the city, state and federal legislatures. According to CNN, starting on or near January 1st, 40,697 new laws will come into effect. Some are very sensible, such as restictions on human trafficking. Others, well others simply epitomize the nanny state at it’s petty and invasive worst.